When you sit on an uncomfortable couch long enough, you might not notice at first. Over time your backache starts to signal that something is wrong. This happened to me, and I didn't put it together that it was due to our old couch until one day, sitting upon a friend's new sofa, it dawned on me that it was time to let this saggy old piece of furniture go. My friend's couch showed me that THIS is what relaxation at the end of a long day should feel like!
I brought it up to my husband, but he resisted the idea of a new couch. It was impractical. There were many other things that took precedent as far as our family spending went. "We don't need a new couch. It isn't that bad," he argued. This awareness was growing in me, and the once sagging cushions now felt like nothing more than a tablecloth on top of some milk crates. Like The Princess and the Pea, I swear I could feel every piece of the wood frame poking up at me in the most hostile and unwelcoming way. It a statement of protest, I refused to sit on the couch, but would stretch out on my yoga mat instead.
Enough was enough! After a week of yogi protest, I took my family to a furniture store, "just to see," and we sat on every single couch in there. Putting comfort at the very forefront, we hunted until we found the very best one. I remember looking over at my husband's relaxed face, as the mechanical couch sized recliner swept his feet up in a cloud of cushiony support. It was like, "OHH! I had NO IDEA this was in the realm of possibility!"
Who cares about a couch, right? First world problems? But the couch serves as a metaphor about what we tolerate in our lives. It is easy to numb out and and get accustomed to our discomfort. Often the thing at the root of it is so close and so obvious that we stop seeing it. Oftentimes we feel disempowered from making a meaningful change.
In coaching we are combing for core beliefs that impact choices and decisions, and factor into what a person is tolerating in life. With this old saggy couch, I think the core belief had to do with what we felt like we deserved. It was an old belief, older than the dust bunnies and balled up socks under the couch that said, "We don't deserve nice things."
What a tremendous block this belief is! How can you create any sense of abundance, or from a place of prosperity with a core belief that you don't deserve the fruits of your work? How can you manifest growth and opportunity from a place of undeserving? You can't!
Similarly, how can you create other things in life, like meaningful work or a fulfilling relationship from a place of Not Deserving or Unworthiness? This speaks to the idea of engaging with life in a really small way. As if saying, "If I don't ask for too much, if I'm not too much of a bother, I will be safe and acceptable. I won't call too much attention to myself. Who am I to have ___________?"
NO! That's all wrong! I titled this, "You Get What You Deserve," with this idea that your thoughts and beliefs are a magnet drawing you forward in life, and attracting opportunity, experiences, relationships, prosperity and more. SO much has been written about the Laws of Attraction, that it feels a little yawny to bring it up again, but I write about this in service of having you look at what core beliefs are blocking you from creating the life you DO deserve.
So I ask, what DO you deserve? What are you doing today, or how are you living and choosing to create the outcome you so desire?
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